Dear World,
  I hope you are doing well, I am left with one more paper for trials, MUET speaking test /shivers/ I generally screwed up (?) alomost every single paper before this, so keep your fingers crossed for me, will you?

  I've made an instagram account for poetic purposes, your kind love and support will be much appreciated. @kipoetry

Song: that one song by gnash
Weather: stars fill the night sky, about time to sleeeep

Lots of love,

Dear world,
  Hi, how's it going? Good? Bad? Or you just simply need a rest, don't we all? As I promised before, I will blog about my little exploration in Kuala Lumpur with the company of two friends from college. 



I am so obsessed with the ambience and decoration of the cafe, I went there twice in two weeks right after tuition. The first week, I shared a big breakfast set with Qif (one of the two) and had a cup of latte, the taste was alright but it was definitely over-priced. The second week however we went with Sas and had Brown Cow brownies (RM9.5++, add on RM5.5 for a scoop of gelato), the taste was to die for and nothing further. P.S. The serving's pretty big, if you are just up for a light bite, one brownie would be a serving for two.

(is there another name for that?)


 Crossings: Pushing Boundaries curated by Shireen Naziree, featuring the art of three generations of 15 Malaysian artists who work internationally. It's a shame that I didn't get pictures of every single piece of art since we were running out of time. However, my favourite piece will be Voyage I by Latiff Mohidin.
Why? However, that remains as an unknown, it just gave me a sense of familiarity and possibly the use my favourite colours, blue and white as the main colours triggered the fondness I feel towards this piece. 

  Anyway, if you happen to see your face in one of my pictures and want it taken down, please let me know, if not you can always say hiiii. That's all for now, have a good week and stay healthy!

Mood: it's trials TOMORROW!!!
Song: Gangsta by Kehlani
Weather: it's sunny out there but I am surrounded by books in my study 

Lots of love,
Dear World,

  It has been quite a while since my last update, and this is the first post of September, if I am not mistaken, yes? My laptop has been experiencing Wifi connection problems and I have been going a trying time as well (academics and responsibilities, whats new?) Here's a poem I wrote yesterday, inspired by a dear friend, just one of the many lame jokes she makes. 

I got a 99 and I want to die,
for I am not the highest,
the girl next door got a 100,
my mother is embarrassed. 
She asked me to study harder,
so that I could be a doctor.
She didn't know I tried my best,
instead she called me a pest,
quit leeching off me and start feeding the rest,
she said. 
Look at your brother,
a well-established lawyer,
she said. 

She knows nothing about my silent tears,
nor my greatest fears,
nor my actual ambition,
she just puts me under suspension. 

I got a 99 and I want to die,
for I am not the highest,
father only cares if I am the best,
even then he says try harder,
even then it doesn't really matter.

He is hardly ever home,
one week in Tokyo, another in Rome,
I wonder if he ever misses home,
or if he considers this as a home.
For whenever he is back,
even before he unpacks, 
my mother will start to peck,
and the house dissolves into chaos,
I will shut my door,
and wait for the music to drown their voices.

I got a 99 and I want to die,
what I really want is just a homemade pie,
tell me good job, it isn't a lie.
Ask me what's on my mind,
ask me if I am alright.
It isn't so hard to make me smile,
please, I don't want to die. 

Note: This poem is not based on my personal experience for I have two loving and supportive parents who constantly encourage me to pursue my dreams. I thank God everyday for them. Instead, this is a silent cry of the children living under the shadows of the others, constantly pushed towards the well-crafted path in their parents' mind ever since birth. A silent message, they want to be loved. I urge you to listen, pay close attention and you will hear. 

  That's all for now, might be updating on my adventures in Kuala Lumpur from Sunday. Have a blessed week. Selamat hari raya aidiladha, for the ones who are celebrating. As for the rest, enjoy your long weekends/ short break.

Song: ilusm by gnash
Mood: trials in less than a week (welp)
Weather: it's sunny out there, it's gloomy in my room. 

Lots of love,

Dear World,
  How are you doing? I am fine but worn out, along with co-curriculum activities, (yes, we still have that in form 6, since we are still considered as high school students) studies, responsibilities, and did i mention co-curriculum? But either way, August has been fun but tiring, especially last week, our school hosted the MSSS and the editorial board had to open up a stall in order to raise funds for school magazine publishing expenses. I didn't know leading such a huge team and organising a stall could be such a tough job until I took it up. Honestly, I was extremely stressed out and I was on the verge of breaking apart but God bless my great great team, THANK YOU, YOU MADE IT HAPPEN, it went so well and for that I am beyond grateful. 
  This Monday during Merdeka celebration, English club had a poem recital performance, they recited two poems and one of them was written by me. I didn't really like the poem but it's all good. At least, my words are making their mini debuts to the crowd. Other than the performance, this week was fine and carefree, aside from the fact that I have to try to keep up with  my studies since trials in in 18 days. (I have been skipping classes a little and all these responsibilities of co-curriculum activities are definitely pulling me down for a bit, but no worries, I will and have to buck up in no time)

  I will be ending the favourites section of my blog because first I barely have time to read, let alone write about books or music every month. But I have been pretty obsessed with gnash's music for this month, me, u, and US are beautiful albums. The lyrics are so raw, I LOVE IT. listen to tell me it's okay, okay?

  And here's a poem that I wrote in this hustle and bustle of 31 days. 

Amidst the sea of,
crashing waves,
of stagnant water,
of ripples crashing onto the shore.
Thoughts in a bottle,
in a jar,
caught up and caught within.
I spelled out your name,
using twigs on the sand,
the waves didn't come,
it remained,
suddenly strange and unknown,
jumbled up and mixed about,
like the emotions I once had. 
Now I feel none,
but the salt against my tongue.
I yearn to speak your name,
call out for that familiar silhouette,
but I am tongue-tied,
and you are tied up,
with strings of society and anxiety.

You fear oblivion,
but don't you know,
I will never leave your side. 
I fear
losing you.  


Song: Warisan
Weather: great, there's rain, let there be no haze
Mood: trials :)))))))

Lots of love,

Dear World,
  It has been a hectic week for me, when has it not been one *sigh*? Anyway, how are you doing? I hope you are doing fine and may God bless you a good life for reading my blog. So here's the poem I promised.


I made a detour that I didn't even understand.

Was it you,
or the thought of waving at you,
your radiant smile, that makes
my heart go a little out of pace.
Was it you,
or the thought of speaking to you,
your big words, that I can't comprehend,
I stuff my mouth with toothpaste.
Was it you,
or the thought of brushing shoulders,
your warmth that radiates through
the two pieces of cloth between us two,
I might freeze and want it to last forever.
Was it you,
or the thought of looking into pitch black among the white,
your eyes that hold my small reflection,
and mine can barely grasp your silhouette,
along with your great dreams and massive thoughts.

Was it you,
or the truth that you will never remain?

  That's all for now, have a great week and I hope I can update all of you soon.

Song: i hate u, i love u by gnash ft. Olivia O'Brien
Weather: I am sweating
Mood: why do I have to wake up early tomorrow *sigh*

Lots of love,

Dear World, 

  As usual, school has been so busy and I barely have time to even finish a book in a month *sobs*, so I guess there will be no book reviews for this month. 

Tracks that have been hanging around
1. i hate u, i love u by gnash ft. Olivia O'Brien
Though I am not exactly feeling the lyrics but I felt like I could to it at an emotional level in way where I love something, but I hate myself for wanting it yet I need it so bad, eg: clothes, food, little trinkets that I can never afford /sobs/

2.All I Do by Yuna
It gives me a soothing vibe while expressing how much the writer misses her lover. She's caught up in her own life yet all she does is think about a love that's long gone. 

Poetry appreciation
She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron

She walks in beauty, like the night,
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light

Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o'er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o'er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
That smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tells of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!

It's a new section and I am not too sure if it will remain for long but this poem is a part of my syllabus for English Literature and it's by far my favourite poem as of now among the rest I studied in the classroom. I love how Byron described the lady's as both dark and bright, where she walks in an aura of beauty but she herself is a brighter beauty herself. The word "gaudy" which means cheap and flashy gives a negative notation, thus emphasizing on how the lady is in perfect equilibrium inside out, which made her extremely beautiful and attractive. 

However, my favourite part remains as "One shade the more, one ray the less, had half impaired the nameless grace" where I self-interpreted as she is in such perfect equilibrium that a slight change in darkness or brightness will make her beauty half impaired. I am not too sure if my interpretation is what what Byron trying to express, and it's also not included in the notes given by my teacher but it is my way of seeing it. 

"When you read, don't just consider what the author thinks, consider what you think."- John Keating, Dead Poets Society

And oh, fun fact, Lord Byron wrote this poem for his first cousin's wife, Mrs Wilmort. 

And that's all for now,it isn't much but I have been really busy with my studies, I can barely keep up. My poem will be up soon, and I will try to update as much as possible.

Song: One Dance by Drake (Cover by Alex Aiono)
Mood: barely awake
Weather; Sunny out but my room is gloomy

Lots of Love,

Dear World,

  YAY, I finally made time for another update, despite the fact that my monthly exam is within a week and I am so battered from excessively packed school routine. It's about time for a getaway, so I wrote one up to quench the thirst of my blooming wanderlust.


I want to go on the most spontaneous adventures,
leaving all these seemingly essentials,
cast packing and that phone aside,
only with my camera and a notebook,
we could run across the world.
Find somewhere high up,
I want to see the world,
observe the blinking light of nightlife.
I would pitch a tent on the peak of the highest mountain within sight,
to sit tight and think about my next flight,
or maybe I should fight.
Think about the next place that I have yet to venture,
sip in murky black coffee,
appreciate the warmth,
allow the aroma to fill my lungs,
under the pitch black sky.
I would listen to your voice,
as you sing to the chill of the night.
Maybe we wouldn't sleep at all,
huddling close,
talk over everything but the weather,
about you and me,
our make-believe future,
I am a little afraid that the tent might fall apart,
upon the weight of our massive dreams and vague memories.

I would allow so many things to run across my mind,
on our way back,
on the back of your van,
as I watch the sun rise from the horizon.

  Until then, have a great week!

Song: Suffer by Charlie Puth
Mood: tired but alright
Weather: just the right sort of chill

Lots of love,