I WOULD RATHER BE

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Dear World,
  And so, I started college on Wednesday, I found out I was starting college THAT MORNING ITSELF, seriously. I thought registration was just registration and we would be free to go right after, but NO, orientation starts immediately. I went there empty handed thinking that I could actually leave after registration, so I went back home whilst being stuck in very very bad traffic to pick up a few things and change, since the form 6 dress code is pretty strict (formal wear). 

  When I got back, they were already starting the briefing session so I got to my seat near some of my Sri Aman schoolmates almost immediately without a proper glance across the room. During the break, I met a few familiar faces and had small talks before the next session. It went on until the afternoon, by then I was already extremely tired and worn out. After I got back home, I literally flopped onto my bed. I just couldn't seem to get use to waking up so early in the morning, so I was equally tired on the second day, maybe worse since we started at 9am on the first day and normal schooling hours 7.30am on the second and the remaining days. Thankfully, things got better on the third, as I am already starting mix around and finally got to know a few more people. 

  The orientation would have to go on for another week and I have a mathematics diagnostic test on Monday, wish me luck!! Here's the last poem I wrote in the period of my 5 months long break after SPM.

I Would Rather Be

I would rather be dancing in the rain,
shouting my apology across the stream,
and let it wash away yesterday,
so that I can finally meet your eyes and smile once again.
Rather than taking shelter under the roof,
closing my eyes to avoid your sorrowful blues.

I would rather be venturing the woods,
take me out of the city,
we can hide between the branches,
they will never find us.
They wouldn't look too closely,
unlike us,
barely an inch apart.

I would rather be by the beach,
in the embrace of the ocean,
allow the sea to swallow me whole,
let the buoyancy carry the weight of my heavy heart.
I need someone to tell me everything's alright,
so I can have races with the waves,
care to join us?

I would rather be behind the camera,
capturing my favourite moments and my closest people.
Rather than forceful grins,
resulting in nothing but pain. 

I would rather be listening to ballads,
in my room, all alone,
rather than pretending to enjoy myself,
in the midst of blasting stereos,
pointless conversations,
build up with slurred words,
blurred lines.

I would rather be talking to a stranger of my kind,
sorry but you are just not my type,
your blatant lies made up to impress,
since there's no real you to be expressed.
You said stop playing with your heart,
I am calling the press,
you with a heart,
that might be my greatest discovery just yet.

Note: I might be updating less often since I am started college and STPM is no joke and THE REAL DEAL. However, I will try to post as often as I can, have a great weekend ahead.

Song: Butterfly (prologue remix) by BTS
Weather: it's raining (it was really scary just now)
Mood: Worn out but good

Lots of love,
Treepokok

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