THEN AND NOW

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Dear World,
   I am hours away from my morning assembly in school tomorrow (groans and rejoice, I don't really want to leave the comfort of my bed, I somewhat want to start studying). 
  
That was a pretty good break, to be frank. Since I managed to:
i. finish all my work (I think, I hope I didn't miss out any)
ii. catch up with my friends back from high school (meeting them was such a bliss, I've missed all of them dearly. I didn't get to catch some of them though, since everyone got busy and it was hard to fix a perfect time, but there's always next time)
iii. get a proper rest from the overwhelming three weeks of school after 5 months of break.
iv. get more family time (but really, I get sufficient amount of that all year round) 
v. READ
vi. revive my time back when I rode the lrt so often, that it was my second transport aside from my dad's car. Honestly, I love observing people and all my sudden inspirations that seemed to pop up out of nowhere (probably the lrt railing) 
vii. write more
viii. study a bit of every subject excluding literature since I had no materials to read up on

  Anyway as I promised in my last post that I would be posting something new soon so here it is.

Then & Now
When I was younger and sober,
I fight monsters in the living with my brother,
sending punches and all my kicks,
we were saving the day.
Today I realized that I am a monster myself,
and saving the world just wasn't so easy,
I can barely save money for lunch.

My mother told me not to touch the oven,
or my hands will burn.
Was it an act of rebel?
I stretch my hand,
within seconds I was in flames.
Today no one would be by my side,
or tell me what to avoid,
and someone might just lead me into blazing red fire.

My pet fish jumped out of the window and died,
I didn't cry,
I just got another and another.
Years later,
I knew that it was trying to escape,
for it wanted a little freedom out of the squared glass,
a little exploration in the world that it could see but can't seem to reach,
it didn't really want to end its life.
(but I can't say, for I wasn't the fish, I might be too horrible of an owner)

When I was a child,
young and naive.
I had a thought that babies were blessed to happy families,
since they were called gifts,
and I was brought up in a happy family of my own.
Now, I see children with bruises from head to toe,
teenage girls solemnly holding their swollen bellies,
and that I was only lucky.

About a decade ago,
I used to cry when I am sad,
I used to scream when I am in pain.
A decade later,
I have learnt how to hold in my tears,
muffle my screams,
keeping them all inside.

I used to think that the world was a bed of roses,
little did the little me know that,
this land is filled with people holding onto,
orange mocks and lilies.

Note: The flower message for orange mock is deceit and orange lilies carries the meaning of hatred.
P.S. note: I don't have a brother, it's my cousin. But cousin didn't rhyme as well as brother.

  That's all for now, I will try to post an update if schoolwork allows and have a great week!!!

Song: Cool by Troye Sivan
Mood: happy//sad
Weather: too cold when I turn on the fan, too warm when I turn it off. Resulted in turning it on and got myself a warm pink sweater.

Lots of love,
Treepokok.

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